Flirting Skills

Archive for April, 2007

Flirting is more than just having some fun and can form a very important aspect to human interaction that is both universal as well as essential to relationships. Flirting has been going on since, well, the days of Adam and Eve and, is known to every culture and people as well as all societies, all around the world. It emanates from human nature and it forms the core of interactions between the sexes and were it not so, there may not have been propagation of the human race at all.

Foundation of Civilization

Some evolutionary psychologists even reckon that flirting is the foundation of all civilization as is known to us, today. With superior intelligence, the human race makes use of its large-sized brain in combining with complex language to distinguish itself from the animal kingdom and can be thought of as being a device used to promote courtship. Much like the tail of a peacock, flirting tries to attract as well as retain partners in sex and it may well dwarf scientific accomplishments that may be merely side effects of romance and flirting.

All human activity has its unwritten laws of etiquette and flirting is no exception and these rules may guide where, when and with whom as well as the manner in which humans will flirt and these laws, albeit unwritten, are generally followed by all, even unconsciously. The first thing a person notices when there is a breach of etiquette, is the unwritten laws and that flirting with the wrong person or at inappropriate places are good examples of such infringements.

Flirting also involves understanding the cues in the partner’s body language and understanding female overtures is quite a complex task and very often friendliness may be mistaken for sexual interest. It also is not considered acceptable in many Puritanical societies and this may lead many a person to fear giving off the wrong signals and thus impede their natural playful and often, harmless flirtation capabilities. This has led to need for adequate social research into the phenomena so as to be better able to deal with its ramifications.

Flirting most often takes place at parties and, is quite acceptable too, and other occasions for flirting would be celebrations as well as social functions and gatherings. New Year’s Day as well as Christmas sees a lot of flirtation and is considered as having social sanction and is almost expected. However, it should not be misinterpreted as being given a license to abandon all norms of acceptable social behavior. Everyone involved must still adhere to social etiquette and acceptable levels of ‘letting the hair down’.

More than ever before, the internet has become something that almost everyone has. Perhaps they use it for work, or perhaps they use it for leisure. One of the best things about the internet is that it allows people to form communities with their loved ones, in which they can e-mail and instant message each other. This being the case, why not take it a step further and also flirt online?

How to Flirt Online Using E-Mail

If you have the e-mail address of a crush, then use that knowledge to you advantage, and flirt with him or her online by sending an e-mail. If you fear rejection, there are several websites that send an e-mail to the person you select, saying something to the effect of “Someone has a crush on You!” If that person guesses you, only then will your identity be revealed.

Be aware that those kinds of websites are mostly used by teenagers, however. So, if you are an adult, chances are that you probably should just directly e-mail your crush. After all, you do not want your crush to think that you are immature.

If you are brave enough to send an e-mail yourself, then keep it very nonchalant, but still let the person know you are interested in their company. For example, when flirting online via e-mail you can say something like, “There’s going to be a concert next week. Will you be going?” This can be taken either platonically or romantically, so in the chance that your crush is going, you can make more of a romantic effort the actual day of the event.

How to Flirt Online Using Instant Messenger

Instant messenger is something that almost everyone uses at one time or another to keep in touch. If you already have you crush’s screen name, then you can use that knowledge to flirt online. Start by asking simple “get-to-know” you questions. However, do not appear overly eager. Only initiate an IM conversation yourself with your crush no more than twice a week, unless your crush IM’s you first.

Fun but Not Forever

Flirting online is a safe way to get to know someone better that you are too shy to talk to in real life, but remember that flirting online can only be fun for just so long. The time will come when you will have to talk face-to-face. So, flirt online for a while, see if you two really connect, and then start planning some real dates!

Perhaps you are a wonderful person who just hasn’t found the “one” yet. Or, perhaps you are a person in a relationship that is losing a bit of its magic, and you need to learn some new techniques to keep the excitement going. Whatever the case, you need a flirt coach.

What is a Flirt Coach?

A flirt coach is what the name implies: a person who can help you with your flirting techniques, or lack thereof. Now, you don’t have to actually pay some sort of a professional to help you learn how to flirt. If you have a friend that has a lot of luck in dating, perhaps you could ask that friend if they would be your flirt coach.

Flirt Coach Techniques

Now, if you have a friend that has decided to become your flirt coach, take a moment to consider why you asked that friend to become your coach in the first place. There must have been something you noticed in their behavior that made you decide to want to choose them.

Perhaps it was the easy way they started conversations with possible love interests while the two of you were out on the town. Perhaps it was a special move they always did while flirting that people always seemed to respond to. Whatever it was, you noticed, and you want to get the same kind of results, and this is where your flirt coaching should start.

Have your flirt coach (who, if a friend, should preferably still be single) take you to a public place, like a park or a department store, and watch that friend use his or her flirting techniques on someone. Be aware that these initial flirting techniques should be subtle.

The reason why you should get your flirt coach to actually show how his or flirting techniques work, is because it is one thing to be told something, and it is a completely different thing to be shown something. In the dating world, you can certainly learn faster if given a visual example.

Ideally, a good flirt coach will give you ideas on how to dress, how to act, and what not to do. Also, don’t react too sensitively if your coach points out specific things that you may have been doing wrong all along. Remember, like in sports, a flirt coach is there to help you improve your game!