Flirting Skills

Archive for January, 2009

Crafting up the right online dating personal ad could be the difference between meeting the love of your life and a total flake.  The worst aspect of dating on the internet and online personals services is that you can’t believe a lot of what you read.  Many people lie on their profiles but how about being the first one to step up to the plate and be honest for a change?  Here are some things to avoid when posting pictures and writing profiles to attract prospective partners.

Post Pictures that Show What you Really Look Like

For pete’s sake, post real pictures!  Don’t just find a random online image of a pretty woman or handsome model to post in your online dating personal ad.  You will be found out in no time.  If you are using pictures of yourself on your online dating personal ad, great, but remember to use recent photos.  There is nothing more depressing than meeting your online date, only to find out they have aged ten years since their picture was taken.

Also avoid posting pictures of yourself hiking in the Grand Canyon, skiing, or doing other activities that do not show much of what people want to see; you.  You might be proud of your travels and accomplishments but when you get down to business, the people looking at your online dating personal ad want to have a good idea of what you look like before contacting you and pictures of you spelunking or bodyboarding just don’t cut it.

Be Careful about what you Write in Your Profile

As much as you may be bitter about your negative online dating experiences or series of relationships ending in a broken heart and sense of despair, don’t use your online dating personal ad as a space to grumble and gripe.  You will scare any potential partners away.  Online dating personal ads are also not a good place to vent about what your dislikes are in life.  Focus on what you enjoy and talk about the most positive aspects of your life and personality.  You will attract more people that way.

Try not to be so demanding when you write about what you look for in a partner in an online dating personal ad.  A long list of unrealistic expectations will only discourage potential mates.  If you are interested in starting a family, it is okay to mention it but try not to appear so desperate and needy.  People will think you are willing to take whoever comes your way for the sake of having children.

Do yourself a favor by crafting an online dating personal ad that says a lot about you in an honest and communicative fashion.  Don’t fall into the common traps that make for unsuccessful online dating!  By keeping these pointers in mind, you will be well on your way to finding that match made in heaven that you never thought possible

Before diving into the world of online personals and internet dating, ask yourself some important questions.  Are you truly willing to put yourself out there and meet a variety of people?  Are you ready to get burned on occasion?  Are you looking for more than just casual chit-chat with an online buddy?  Online personals and internet dating are popular with people who are too busy to look for partners in real life, people who have bad luck in love, or people who are too shy to approach people in real life.  Rather than waste other peoples’ time as well as your own, make sure online personals and internet dating are a good fit for you before signing up with any dating site.

Examine your Thoughts around Online Personals and Internet Dating

Ever think to yourself that only losers use online personals and internet dating?  If there is a stigma attached to it in your mind, most likely that negative feeling will reflect on anyone you meet.  You are automatically going to think your potential partner is some kind of loser for having to meet people through online personals and internet dating.  Save people grief and yourself a waste of time.

Determine Your True Desires

If you your plans are to join an online personals and internet dating site and then just kick back and wait for the emails to pile in, you might want to question your motives.  In order to make the most of online personals and internet dating, you must be willing to put yourself out there.  Simply logging in and seeing whether people email you or not will not get you anywhere.  Decide whether you are truly willing to interact with a variety of people and message them if you are interested.  Expect to not receive a response in return at times.  Don’t take it personally if the feelings aren’t reciprocal.

You also have to have the desire to eventually meet the people in person.  That brings us to the next factor.  If you have no desire to meet someone in real life after talking to them for some time on the phone or online, don’t sign up at an online dating site.  The point of online personals and internet dating is to find a mate who will roll over into your real life, eventually.

Can you Spend Time Maintaining your Profile?

Your online dating and personal ad is the digital version of you.  Prospective lovers are going to judge you by it so in order to meet winners you are going to have to spend time crafting a nice profile complete with pictures.  Profiles that don’t have pictures are often overlooked.  Try to keep your profile updated and try not to sound so bitter.  You will scare potential mates away if you use your profile to rant about how you hate selfish women or cheating male chauvinists.
Your goal?  Sit down and think about whether it is worth investing your time to find a mate online.  For some lovebirds, online personals and internet dating was their key to finding love and happiness but in order to get there, you have to be willing to put in your effort and time.  If you do so, you are likely to find Mr. or Ms. Right with time and patience.

With the advent of the internet, the online personals and internet dating scene has been booming.  While the idea of browsing through profiles of potential partners and window shopping for lovers might sound enticing, you may realize that it’s necessary to dig through a lot of bad apples in order to find your ideal match.  Here are some common red flags to look for when perusing online dating personals.

Learn to Detect Liars

The most common thing people lie about in online dating personals is their appearance.  They might try to pretend they are taller or slimmer.  Another popular lie is age.  Expect that many people are actually a few years older than they claim to be.  In order to gauge whether someone is lying, message them and ask them directly about their height, weight, and age.  Don’t beat around the bush.

Also beware of online dating personals that only contain one photo or photos taken only from a certain angle.  Some people use photos of themselves when they were younger and better-looking.  Others take photos only from certain angles because they are trying to hide something about their appearance. Then there are those who use photos of a different person altogether.  If the person in the photo looks hot enough to be in Hollywood, you might want to verify if it is authentic or not.

While you may be honest about your single status and desire to be in a serious relationship, don’t always believe what people say in their online dating personals.   When people say they are single or separated in online dating personals, they may simply be lying.  Some dishonest folks use online dating sites as a way to meet different partners and cheat on their real-life partners.  Red flags to look for are if the person is only available to talk during the day on the telephone, only talks on their cell phone, and generally isn’t available nights or weekends.

If someone claims they are separated in an online dating personal, ask them about it.  You may find that some people are only separated in their minds.  The best way to avoid dating cheaters and married people is to stay local.  If the person is thousands of miles away, you will never know what is really going on and it could cost you time and your heart.
So there you have it.  Browsing online dating personals can be fun but you also have to be weary of people who are lying to fluff up their profile or escape reality.  With some careful searching and by asking the right questions, you will be well on your way to finding potential lovers and partners that are as truthful and sincere as you are.